As well as our first request for festival tickets I've personally had some very good news. We might have to buy a van. It might be unavoidable, in fact it is probably necessary. I can feel the envy as you read.

I'm sure I'm not the only fella who feels a sense of legitimacy and belonging behind the wheel of a Ford Transit. The feeling that one might be doing a proper useful job, like building a house or delivering paint. That someone might not realise you are a middle class pen pushing, keyboard poking idiot.

I used to have an old red Astra van which I inherited from my mother-in-law's business. It was great, not as great as a transit but still a van. I drove it to work in Leeds in my new job as an IT technical consultant, the managing director was not too happy about having given a customer facing role to someone who couldn't of chosen a more inappropriate vehicle for client meetings. His name was Guy Hodges, I always thought he should be in a band called Guy Hodges and the Hedges. He once got my name wrong twice, calling me Paul before correcting himself and calling me Martin, such was the impact I made in that job. I once went up to Perth council and gave the 'worst training session we've ever had'. My hostile views of the public sector started here.

The red van used to go with me down to London when we were reletting our flat and I used to have to go into various builders and plumbing merchants. I tried to make it through an entire visit to the plumming shop without getting found out. It started well, I got out of van outside the shop, pencil behind ear tape measure in pocket, essentially I looked like a plumber. I asked the fella behind the counter if he knew any good plummers, he assumes that mean to install some hi-tech central heating system. What's the job he asks? Changing some taps I say. Much chortling behind trade counter - it's not rocket science says one - not unless your rocket has got taps on it, says another. Huff.

Anyway I aspire to owning a van, useful for general festival humping and mountain biking trips. Kate says it will have to be parked at the back of the house, I've yet to tackle her properly on this. Presumably so it doesn't intimidate the Volvo. Girls don't understand.

In other festival news, a terrible start to the PR campaign to get the local villagers onside as our highways contractor (who is putting in the new festival entrance) diggers through the village's main BT phone line cable. No less than 4 BT vans turn up and work into the night to fix it. Such are the unforeseeables. I can already hear the mumblings in the pubs. Might have to go on the PR offensive and call in Max what's his face.

I've put up a simple festival holding page at www.deershedfestival.com. It doesn't say much but it will serve to get the site onto Google's listings and as high up a search for 'Yorkshire festival' as possible.

There is much to do at the festival site to get it ready, but we're making a start. Below a picture from this weekend's party, burning lots of the wood from the trees cleared to make way for the new site entrance (next pic)

For all you in the sarf who can't remember the word for those rectangular yellow things that appear in fields sometimes (bales) I've included some pictures of some handy rural farm vehicles for educational purposes. These can be casually dropped into conversation at Clapham dinner parties and are bound to impress.

First up is father-in-laws Manitou forklift (he loves it). Running at 3 miles to the gallon, it has serious grunt and is very handy in the garden for moving sheds, even full ones. The Maserati of forklifts.

Here is what is called a Gator, made by John Deer, but the 5 year olds will know this already because it is green, all John Deer stuff is green. Not as much fun as the previously knicked Honda quad bike, but a safer and completely legal way to transport small children.

After months of drawing rubbish festival logos in me moleskin diary Matt Pattinson has struck again within a few hours of receiving his In The Dock newsletter, thanks Matt, the feeling is that it's a winner

I must admit to being very pleased when a theme develops for a blog posting. The theme this time is stuff that is dull as. This theme was reinforced having just had a meeting with our very nice financial adviser Martin. Martin, who I'm sure thinks I'm an idiot (but would never let on) has to watch me glaze over again as he and Kate discuss what proportion of our savings should go into corporate bonds and then me whitter on about how on his next visit could he find us an investment with a bit more PIZAZZ!!!

I've been glazing over quite alot recently. Kate, Smithy and I had a meeting about the licence application and the health and safety document that we have to write. Smithy, who as you will remember shares my first name, my hobbies and my haircut has only gone and bought an almost identical pair of specs to mine. This means that we both now look like a white version of Howard of the Halifax TV ads. I have to insist that he removes them if we're both out in public.

Anyway, who would work in health and safety? What would you think about working in a government department that other countries simply do not feel the need for? You can't help but love the French. Kate and Smithy come close to an argument over whether anyone would ask a roadie for his health and safety assessment before setting foot on the festival site. In my twenties I had a stint on the road with a band called Sunhouse (another story), often sharing a hotel room with our roadie Nick from Edinburgh. Having taken more drugs than [insert your best known hellraiser here] Nick couldn't go to sleep without the telly on, his body odour was legendary and he certainly hadn't done his risk assessment the day a year or two ago when I heard he had fallen down a flight of stairs and barely, and I mean BARELY, cheated death.

I suspect if he'd done his health and safety risk assessment properly he'd wouldn't of allowed himself out of bed that morning. It is with this view of the roadie lifestyle that Kate refuses to stand next to any roadie with a clipboard. Quite right, although, we don't want to be sued if anything heavy falls out of the sky. Can't help but feel all the H & S stuff is an exercise in bureaucratic box ticking but if we need to do it, do it we shall. The licence is king.

Anyway, deeply dull.

Lastly on a dull note, I've made a start on our web based contacts database. Due to Microsofts usual inability to build anything truely useful for less than £20,000 I've constructed a database within which you can classify contacts. You will also be able do the following sort of thing - email all contacts who are festival ticket buyers AND who have kids AND have been to J Tillman. It will be an absolutely spamtastic marketing tool. Outlook obviously supports lists of contacts but not contacts belonging to one or many other groups and filtering thereof. Told you it was dull.

I've not gone for a pint after footie tonight so I'd better blog instead innit. One goal for me in a quite subdued game. One of my midlife [crisis] goals is to not be the worst player at Tuesday night football which I've been going to for 18 months. Recently I've been doing much better, I generally blame my Dad for my late start at footie competence. I'm sure reading 2 Sunday papers cover to cover whilst listening to Wagner didn't leave much park time (but you are forgiven.) Other midlife goals include ramping my mountain bike 6ft into the air and having a hit single, can't blame my Dad for these.

As we're in the process of filling in the licence forms for the festival I've been to see some of the people who live around the site, so far I've been to see a neighbouring farm and static caravan park. I also have to write to all the local parish councils and let them know what we are planning before they find out by other means.

I think it is fair to say that some I've talked to are somewhat worried by what we are planning, security of property being at the top of the list of concerns. Some of these concerns are legitimate and others are not as quantifyable, but ultimately these concerns need to be put to rest as far as is possible and we need to deliver on any promises around the time of the festival. The continuation of the licence depends upon it. Dull.

After looking at these stretch tents we had a really helpful visit from tent expert Alex, who put us in touch with tent expert Rolly. Both these guys make tents to order out of traditional canvas and I'm really excited to see some pictures of the sort of tents Rolly could make for us. I'll post them here when I get hold of them.

I've also bought a picture off the very talented David Setter AKA the Compulsive Scribbler. He is a facebook friend of our friend Matt Pattinson. Matt is a brilliant illustrator who has over the years not given in to commercial pressure (i.e. he's broke) and has done exactly what he wants to do. We're hoping that both of these guys will be at the festival doing workshops, selling their stuff and contributing to our graffiti doodle wall. Hopefully we can get at least one more contempory artist or illustrator from Matt or David's recommendations.

Overall the sort of festival we're going to have is coming into focus, with 2 music stages and a kids tent being the main three areas of entertainment. We're going to be spending money on 10 bands and a handful of other acts (caberet, comedy, spoken word.) We're doing quality not quantity and I can foresee lots of heated discussions amongst us as to who we approach and ultimately book. There will be no fillers.

After countless scribbles I also think that I've cracked the logo and I've just registered www.deershedfestival.com (don't hold your breath). One thing I'm not sure about though is whether this blog should feature on the festival site itself. Kate says it should, but then what commercial enterprise contains such random ramblings?